tonight, i watched King Kong.....yes.....and perhaps its cause its 4am, or cause we started studying Song of Soloman today, or just cause i'm cynnical and single, but i saw a very strong correlation between kong and guys....that's right....i will now analyze the metaphor between man and ape for each of you....
The Art of Attraction (Ann and Kong-a tragic love story)
-similarities btwn guys and kong:
- like to climb things
- have opposable thumbs (very important to species survival-esp if living in a jungle w/prehistoric creatures and gigantic bugs-added bonus: you can catch a falling girl while simultaneously fighting off 3 t-rexes)
- wreckless endagerment (to themselves as well as anyone near them...anyone ever seen jackass?)
- jealousy guides actions
- hairy
- bad manners and poor housekeeping skills (at least throw out the skulls and rotting carcasses once a wk please)
- less than par communication skills (sorry, but we girls don't easily translate hand gestures and grunts)
- easily entertained (falling down is only funny once)
- beat their chest to proclaim they are king of the mtn (there is even a game to honor this)
- slow to learn even simple things (so the ape doesn't speak english, surely he knows sign language! who doesn't?....well, apparently kong, cause it took the whole movie for him to learn one word-beautiful)
- they'll pout if you leave them
- expect something in return for saving you
- even when going down they still need to continue fighting (some don't know when to quit...you are falling off the cliff-forget about the t-rex and concentrate on saving yourself, why are you punching them...arghhh!)
- always in pursuit of a girl (not that i can blame you)
- need a challenge (adrenaline junkies)
- an innate desire to save and protect girls
-so the above list isn't all bad....just truths and similarities.....but there is something that can also be learned from Ann
-why she kept coming back for more (when danger obviously followed him):
- we're suckers for being pursued
- sometimes we like the company of companions who can't speak
- if stranded in a scary jungle with natives that will sacrifice you or cut off your head-its always good to have a protector around
- we think we can turn even the most hopeless cause into the best behaved-we like to band-aid things to a fault
-even in the midst of crisis a woman should always strive to:
- Be beautiful
- take time to laugh a little and have fun (central park and frozen pond=fun even if the whole city is after you with guns)
- wear heels when running and perhaps skimpy clothing (at the very least, you'll look sexier doing it)
- enjoy the sunsets/sunrises (from the empire state bldg if u have access)
- don't give up hope until the end of the fight
"It wasn't airplanes. It was beauty that killed the beast."
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